Let’s connect

4 Things That Are Keeping You From Being Enough

Comments on this entry are closed.

It’s TruthBomb Tuesday! (Trying something new).

Many of you know that I’m a big fan of Danielle LaPorte and I love, love, love her truth bombs. So, every Tuesday, I’d like to share a truth with you on embracing your enoughness, finding fulfillment, and claiming your happiness. (Hint, hint, it all has to do with living true to who you are).

So today, I’m sharing 4 things that keep you from your enoughness, which I just did a scope about this morning if you want to check it out.

Ready to dive in? Let’s go.

The 4 things that keep you from your enoughness are:
1. Not forgiving yourself from the past
2. Not acknowledging your success
3. Not acknowledging the expectations you try to live up to
4. Not setting your own expectations that allow you to live true to who you are.

Not Forgiving Yourself:

I wrote an article a couple of years ago on how to forgive yourself and let go of the past, which you can read here.

When we don’t do the inner work of forgiving ourselves for the past, we carry around guilt and shame. Easy as that. Shame is the main culprit that keeps us from being enough because it’s shame that tells you “because you ________, you aren’t enough. How could you be so stupid? How could you be so careless?” When we carry these kinds of thoughts around, (mind you, they don’t have to come up all the time to wreck havoc), we limit our enoughness. Want to do away with it? Do the inner work necessary to truly and deeply forgive yourself and accept the choices you made at that time. Everyone makes mistakes. You’re no different.

Not Acknowledging Your Success:

You know what I know? That we’re all our worst critics, especially high achievers because we strive for perfection. We strive for better. We strive for bigger. We strive to be the best. And in order for us to be any of these things, someone has to be below us, which means this is a game of comparison and seeing how we measure up to others. Want to know one of the biggest patterns that steals joy? It’s self-criticism and it comes in all kinds of forms (the 4 P’s included). So, instead of tearing your work down, of being hypercritical… how about standing in your achievement? How about standing in your success and for once acknowledging how kick ass you are? I’ll tell you, it does wonders!

Not Acknowledging the Expectations You Live Up To:

Every single one of us has been influenced by our culture (both macro: think nationality, micro: think geographical part of the country, and nuclear: think family and inner circle). None of us are immune to taking on the beliefs and expectations in our culture. In fact, it’s mostly necessary in order to be a rule abiding citizen. But where it gets off course is adopting society’s view of success, happiness, and fulfillment. Our country preys off of never enoughness. The beauty industry, the financial industry, even the coaching industry. We’re bombarded daily with ways we’re not enough. Just pick up a magazine cover. And it’s not just women. Men too. Of what we’re supposed to look like, what a family should be like, how much money we should make, how much we should donate, what clothes we should wear, etc. etc. Think about it. If you have never acknowledged all the ways these messages influence your own standards and expectations for yourself, you’re missing a HUGE piece in claiming your enoughness.

Not Setting Your Own Expectations:

Following #3, it’s just as important to define your concepts of success, happiness, and fulfillment. Maybe some of your definitions will overlap with what society tells you. Maybe completely not. When we establish our own expectations, we may split from what society tells us. We may split from what our parents tell us. We may split from the grand majority, but this is GREAT! Because it’s when we establish our own rules that we create the freedom to live true to who we are. That means success and happiness and fulfillment don’t have to mean you becoming a lawyer, doctor, or some high powered financier on Wall Street (for example). Success can be honoring who you are, expanding your creativity, learning to love deeply, exploring, creating adventure, etc. Your enoughness won’t come fully into your grasp until you establish your own expectations.

These 4 things are also why mantras aren’t effective when it comes to enoughness. Enoughness comes from more than simply repeating “I’m enough, I’m enough”. You have to do the soul work (as listed above) to create true freedom. And that’s what I want for everyone.

I don't want you to try and convince yourself you're enough. I want you to know it.Click To Tweet And the only way I know to get you there is by breaking free from the things that insult your own soul and live vividly into who you are!!

Happy Truth Bomb Tuesday! So, give me some feedback here. Do you agree with these 4 steps? Do you need help on these 4 steps? Where are you on these 4 steps? Let’s talk.